Whenever we see someone say “You can get anything that you want”, we cringe. Well I used to and still do a bit to be honest. But that’s the reason why I’m writing this.
What would it be like if we could snap our fingers and ‘the thing that we want’ show up in front of us?
Life would be boring. There’s no excitement, no learning and no adventure.
At the same time, we’ve heard about the word “alignment”. We need to be in alignment in order to manifest what we desire. In this woo-woo age, many people are getting so many confusing messages. You’ve heard of the Law of Attraction. You’ve heard of the Manifesting process.
So you start following the process but you don’t see any result. After all, you always knew it’s all just airy fairy fluff - note what you’ve just affirmed in your head.
I’m not here to contradict anything or decide what’s right and wrong. But I’m here with the intention to stop the confusion and the disbelief that stems out of this process that people have been trying but not working.
I want to help you stop blaming the New Age spirituality or the “spiritual teachers”. I want to help you actually see results in what you’re doing. I want to help you get excited about getting into alignment. I want to help you go on an adventure of getting anything that you want - even if you don’t know how.
The age of speed
If you notice today, everything is right at the tip of our fingers. If we feel unwell, we have a ‘doctor’ called Google ready 24/7. If we want to build a business, we can type a few words and the articles teaching about ‘how to start a business’ pop up. If we want to learn how to wear a shawl in different ways, there are videos showing ‘100 ways of wearing a shawl’. This one blows my mind!
Not only that, if we look at just Gen X and Gen Ys, there seems to be a gap in terms of mindset where Gen Ys tend to want things right here and now. “No patience”, people say but I would say it’s more of how we’ve grown accustomed to as we grow up.
Gen Ys are quick at implementation with speed but the downside of it is, implementing once isn’t enough. We need to keep implementing and keep taking action until it becomes natural to us - which means it requires repetition.
Applying the project management philosophy
Coming from a diverse background of managing several projects in my past corporate careers before I start running my business, growing up in a highly spiritual community and, spending years of education in science and human psychology allows me the opportunity to look at things from different perspective.
Now if we take life as a project, when we’re designing our lives in a way that serves us so we can be the best versions of ourselves, we need to have prototypes and develop things in cycles of repetition.
We create a prototype of how we want our lives to be and how we want to show up in the world using our imagination and then writing it down as journals and goals. Then we execute our plan to deliver that project. Then we see result(s).
In a nutshell, that’s the manifesting process. That’s goal setting. That’s writing a script of the movie that we call life. That’s practical woo-woo!
The only challenge we face is - some never even get to the startup phase of prototyping. Some get there but never really do the planning of visualisation, creating imaginations and setting goals. Some do that and see certain results but forget to repeat the process.
As a result, we’ve dug half-hearted holes hoping to find gold. If we were to be a little bit more disciplined, persistent and dedicated, gold may be just a few inches away.
“Millennials have no patience”, they say. I’d say discipline.
So with that, here’s the breakdown of the phases that we need to go through until the process of the getting what we want becomes natural and until we become embodied leaders of our own destiny.
This is a phase where we have certain knowledge and intellect. We have read books, listened to talks and learned from people. This is purely knowledge that resides in the head. “Knowledge is power” many say. I respectfully disagree. Knowledge without wisdom is actually dangerous.
In this phase, we can trick ourselves into thinking that we know it already and therefore, we know what to do and we don’t need to learn anymore. That’s when our growth stops. As they say, “We know what we know. We know what we don’t know. And… we don’t know what we don’t know”.
That’s why as long as we operate from a the perspective of ‘We don’t know what we don’t know’ then we start to live in the land of possibilities.
Falling in love phase
This is the phase of learning to fall in love with ourselves, our ideas and the process we’re about to go through. It’s hard to step into our greatness and get what we want if we don’t love what we’re doing. We fall in love with the idea of getting what we want but we entirely forget about falling in love with the process.
It’s going to be painful - just like working out for the first time - but if our focus is on the reward and intention is to become a better person, then you’ll be supported. First by yourself, then by people around you and by something bigger than you.
As Lewis Howes says “When other people are stressing out about their lives but you’re at peace because you’ve learned to trust the process”. I couldn’t agree more. Trust can be hard to cultivate but it can be learned. Trust is twofold; trusting in the process and trusting in our ability.
Sun Tzu said “The battle is won before it’s even started” - when we trust that we’ve got this, we’re already half way there.
This is the phase where we learn to start trusting again despite the past failures, struggles or hurts. This is where we begin to feel empowered. Like one of my teachers say “Faith is what keeps us going. What if the day comes when we lose faith in ourselves, what are we going to believe in?”
This is the phase where we choose courage over stories, vision over fear, integrity over perfection and ourselves over the patterns that hold us back. It’s the choosing that we do every single day over and over again until it becomes natural - until we embody the version of ourselves we aspire to be.
When we embody -
- We walk our talk,
- We live, breathe and experience before we share,
- We are ruthlessly aligned with what we want,
- We take responsibility of our responses and experiences,
- We hold ourselves accountable and
- We show up with power, integrity, conviction and clarity.
So in a nutshell, in order to get what we want in life, we need to continuously choose the version of ourselves that we want to step into consciously.
We are always in alignment and we always get what we need in life - it may be in a form of lessons and learnings or it may be in a form of health, wealth and happiness. The key here is to do the work wholeheartedly and to keep doing it until it becomes natural.
Arabelle Yee is an internationally recognised Speaker, Life & Business Strategist and High Performance Coach. She helps individuals, entrepreneurs and professionals become the best at what they do through the power of mindset
This post was originally published on Huffington Post.