When I started my business, all I wanted was the strategy and tools for me to get started asap until I realised that everything in life doesn’t work that way. I learned this from the “I’m not your guru” guy - Tony Robbins of course. He’s been a teacher of mine for the past 15 years. And the rule that I learned from him is - in business is, 80% mindset and 20% strategy.
This changed how I run my business, how I show up in my life and how I work with my clients.
1. Relationship to Self
When I help my clients with their businesses, whether to start one or to take it to the next level, one of the first things I look at is by asking them questions that’s related to their relationship to themselves. How we see and feel about ourselves has a massive impact on our business. If we see ourselves as a failure, not good enough, not confident or not worth it deep down subconsciously, that’s going to show up in our business.
When I started my business, all I wanted was the strategy and tools for me to get started asap until I realised that everything in life doesn’t work that way.
Because there’s a rule. The rule in business is, 80% mindset and 20% strategy. Once I understood this, everything changed. So on the 11th month of the year, I want to share with you 11 things I learned from my business.
2. Relationship with Others
Likewise, if we have a subconscious belief that everyone is judging us and criticising us, that’s going to shrink our ability to show up fully. The truth is, most people are more focussed on themselves rather than us. While you’re focusing on how you’re being perceived, others are also focusing on how they’re being perceived by you. That changes the game doesn’t it?
3. Fear is a sign of Growth
Fear is a sign of growth. Fear comes in when we minimise ourselves compared to others, believing that others know more and are better than us. I once did an eye-gazing exercise with a man who was 6’ 4”. I’m the size of his leg! But he wouldn’t look at me in my eyes and at the end I asked him why and he said “Because I didn’t want to be intimidated by you!”.
That put everything into perspective for me; everyone is afraid…in their own way. But I know that I have a gift and a message that can impact many people’s lives. Like you. Therefore, if I really want to help others, I have to start focussing on the positives and the impact I can make rather than my fears because if I focus on my fears, I’m doing a massive dis-service to everyone I could help.
4. Law of Duality
Everything in life is in balance. That’s called Law of duality. There can be no success without failure, no growth without challenge, no light without darkness, no night without day and no receiving without giving. Therefore, we can’t just focus on the good things without wanting to embrace the not-so-good things. There’s no gain without pain. When we’re in deep pain, fear or hurt, it’s hard to focus on the opposite but understanding the Law of duality changes everything.
Even if you’re being challenged, you’re also being supported at the same time. I was once helping a friend who was grieving on the loss of her partner which was affecting her business. When she was willing to do the work, we were able to dissolve the grief within an hour. It’s that possible!
All of us are born with the intuition; the gut feeling, the deep knowing, that sense of feeling when you know something is right or not right. In business and when dealing with people, we must learn to tap into our intuition because it’s our internal guidance system (GPS). When we start to learn to listen to our intuition, we make better decisions.
That’s why I say make big decisions with your heart and small decisions with your head.
6. Decide.. Today
Many people lose so many opportunities by thinking too much, trying to weigh the pros and the cons. If you ask every single person who’s successful, they have made more mistakes in their lives than other people BUT they learn, they grow and when they succeed, it’s the quantum leap. Making decisions quick … the technique that I learned is called “5, 4, 3, 2, 1 decide!” and when we train ourselves to make decisions quick, we act fast, we grow fast and we succeed… fast!
7. Give before Receive
Business is about profit but when we focus on giving first and giving more without worrying what will be left for us, you receive more. When you come from a place of heart, loving and giving, it reciprocates. Even if it doesn’t, it makes you a good person. It has an effect on people. And it eventually reciprocates!
8. Be Grateful
It’s hard be grateful for the challenges, the hurt and the difficulties as we go through life. Trust me - 2016 is a year of turbulence for me. I think I’ve gone through so much this year that could potentially equate to 10 years worth of learning. But every time I cry, I’m thankful. Every time I’m hurt, I’m thankful. Every time I go through a massive challenge, I’m thankful. Because without them, I wouldn’t have gone this deep and unlock this many levels of transformations within such a short time!
9. Start before you’re Ready
I used to be a perfectionist. Everything had to be ready, the stars needed to align and I had to have everything ready before I started something. As a result, I couldn’t get anything started. One of my mentors taught me that if I’m not embarrassed about the things that I’ve done in the past, then I hadn’t really started let alone achieved anything. If I watch the videos that I’ve done 6-12 months ago, I couldn’t even look at myself but it didn’t stop from creating those videos.
But the thing is, I’ve had a few people told me how my videos from a year ago have helped them get through things. Well that’s it, isn’t it? If I could help just one person, I’m already living my dream. After all, life isn’t perfect. There’s beauty in the imperfection. The imperfection itself is perfect.
10. Child-like vs Childish
Approach everything and anything in life with the child-like behaviour. Be curious, inquisitive, daring, adventurous and willing. That’s the only way I know to truly live. Whereas, when we approach things with child-ish behaviour, we live in the victim-consciousness; we blame others, we don’t take responsibility of our feelings and emotions, we pity ourselves, we make ourselves shrink, small and eventually disappear. There’s nothing good about that.
11. Self Investment
Finally, I’m keeping the best for last. Self-investment. Yes, it’s the most important thing. The best investment one can ever make in their life and business is to invest in themselves. There had been many times I invested in a course, a training, a mentor or a coach without having the money. I never make excuses like “I don’t have the money. My partner wouldn’t allow me. I have other priorities.” Sure I want to go on a trip, buy nice things but they WILL come once I up-level myself because when I invest in myself, I grow. When I grow, I give. When I give, I’m empowered. When I’m empowered, then I can in turn empower others.
There are so many other things I did throughout the year of course but these are the ones that I think are most important to share right now. Because I am my business and my growth directly has an impact on how much I can make a difference in other people’s lives, I would be doing these things all over again next year.
If you’re in the process of starting a coaching, consulting or speaking business or in the first one to two years of your business, I wrote an ebook which give you clarity, step by step approach and strategy to get you started. You can download it here for free.